When getting into BDSM, knowing that there is a possibility of accidents happening is crucial. Knowing that means you have to prepare yourself to deal with those situations efficiently. You’ll need to do a lot of talking, as well as learn some basic first aid skills, just in case. Don’t worry, because we have all you need to know right here in this article.
Not Preparing Is Preparing to Fail
When you’re just getting into the world of BDSM, the most important thing you should do is prepare for your act/play. In doing so, you’re preventing a series of accidents from happening. We know what you’re thinking — How could there possibly be any accidents? Well, imagine doing a bondage act. Don’t you think there could be a bondage accident? We think so.
When it comes to accidents, they don’t need to be severe to be scary. Since we started talking about bondage, plenty of things can happen. For example, tying the rope (or whatever you’re using) too tightly can result in circulation being cut off. However, that wouldn’t be the least of your worries.
BDSM plays, in general, can simply go wrong at times. People are in a different mindset, which means it’s entirely possible for them to be too rough or aggressive for a moment. While that won’t always result in serious injuries, it can be prevented by simply preparing for your act. Preparation largely consists of communicating with your partner, coming up with safe words, setting some boundaries, etc. No, that won’t ruin the mood at all. In fact, it could save you from accidents.
Stay Calm
In case something does happen, it’s in human nature to immediately panic. That can be counterproductive and dangerous for many reasons. First of all, not only will you get scared, but your partner will too. So, let’s leave the dramatics for your BDSM scenes and roleplay.
Remaining calm is what saves the day here. Firstly, you have to assess the situation and then act accordingly. You won’t be able to do that if you’re panicking about the entire situation. Taking a few deep breaths will help. You can even talk to yourself out loud. Your partner can also help you calm by staying calm as well.
Remember — to figure out if the situation is as bad as you think. You have to view it with a clear mind.
Stop Immediately
Once your mind is clear, you’ll be able to understand the situation at hand. This is the perfect time to immediately stop doing whatever you’re doing. Or even stop the scene altogether. Some accidents you can’t just bounce back from. Not only will the mood be gone, but the person can suffer injuries.
That is why having a safe word in all BDSM plays is essential. A safeword is there to signalize that things might be getting out of hand. Plus, anyone can use it before things go sideways, so everyone involved remains safe.
Don’t try to be edgy, thinking you don’t need a safe word because you know what you’re doing. BDSM, in general, is built on the grounds of safety, trust, safe words, and aftercare. These things are here for a reason, and you should be using them as well.
Communicate
As we said before and will repeat as many times as possible, communication is the key to everything working smoothly. Communication is a vital part of planning a scene. You should talk everything out with your partner, just to make sure everyone is on the same page. Not only will you avoid misunderstandings, but also lessen the chances of getting into an accident.
See these tips on how to avoid misunderstanding.
Communication isn’t only vital for planning — it’s also essential during the act itself. If something seems to be going wrong, there needs to be a way of signaling it timely. It doesn’t always need to be words. It can be sounds, certain movements, or whatever else you can think of. What matters is telling your partner that you think something that shouldn’t be happening is happening.
Act Accordingly
Think back to what we said about staying calm. When you’re calm, you’re able to assess the situation properly. In turn, that allows you to act accordingly. Still, some thought needs to be put into this as well. For example, if your partner is stuck, you can’t aggressively try to yank them out of whatever they’re stuck in. That can result in even more unnecessary harm.
Acting accordingly means you shouldn’t be making any rash decisions. As always, rapid response is never a good idea. It’s like saying the wrong thing when you’re angry. Stepping back and taking the time to understand what’s going on is essential. Sometimes that might be hard because some situations will require you to act as soon as possible.
Basic First Aid Knowledge Comes Handy
So, let’s talk about some of the more serious accidents. Sure, your partner can get stuck, but what if they faint? What if they unexpectedly start choking? There are a million things that can go wrong, and that’s not the case in BDSM only. A lot of things can go wrong during vanilla sex as well, and you have to be capable of helping your partner.
Basic first aid knowledge comes in handy no matter what situation you’re in. It doesn’t need to be just BDSM acts. We’re talking about life in general. Knowing how to help someone who’s unconscious, how to bandage an injury, or disinfect a wound can be of great help. (See how to do basic first aids here)
Being prepared just in case never hurt anybody, but can prevent others from getting more hurt.
Get Some Help
If it turns out that the situation is indeed more serious than you can manage, it’s perfectly fine to get some help. That might be embarrassing for some because leading a BDSM life isn’t something everyone would readily share. So, you and your partner should have a list of contacts you trust that can come help if necessary.
Calling the ambulance also shouldn’t be your last resort. If you see that the situation is turning really bad, professionals will always be able to help you out. Unfortunately, having a contract might be necessary for some acts as well. Both parties do give consent, but in case the worst scenario happens, the other person needs to have some sort of security.
Conclusion
Having an accident during a BDSM act isn’t uncommon, but that shouldn’t worry you. If you go into it prepared, you won’t struggle with managing any situation you find yourself in. To avoid those accidents, though, you should communicate with your partner beforehand.
